MASTER AND COMMANDER: THE FAR SIDE OF THE WORLD 5. Kim Jong Il

According to North Korean media, the first time Jong Il ever played golf:

a) He shot five holes-in-one and finished the day 38 under-par.

b) He scored three touchdowns and led his team to victory.

c) He got drunk off his ass.

Jong Il claims that, because he is God's chosen leader, it is his divine right to possess:

a) Nuclear missiles.

b) Palace uniforms as cool as the ones in The Wizard of Oz.

c) Wallet photographs of Vin Diesel.

d) The head of Vin Diesel.